Real Life Real God

     I sometimes find myself feeling disappointed. We teach our kids to treat others the way they want to be treated but so often as adults we miss the mark even more than them. I feel very strongly about being yourself. God wired us all so differently. If your trying to be something you're not it is very much like forcing a square peg into a very round hole. IT JUST DOES NOT WORK. You end up frustrated and full of fear and anxiety. I trust God and I know he LOVES me. I know my children know that God is real and the world is harsh at times. There is SO much of parenting that is a personal choice. I don't compare. I trust my Savior. If you're  a parent to more than one child you know how different they are. I have 2 boys. COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. I love that. They are unique and special. I am really asking God to help me raise them without pressures of them being something they are NOT!! I hope I am encouraging and teaching them to be THEMSELVES!! I want them to feel free to express themselves and know they are exactly who God created them to be. EVEN WHEN THEY MAKE HUGE MISTAKES. I don't want perfect children. I was far from perfect. I made so many mistakes I found myself in prison. YEP!! I have embraced my past and I do not live in fear of it. There is a lot of pressure in being a mom, wife, or woman in general. It is our cultural. It's hard for women to encourage other women. I don't know why. Are we too busy? Too overwhelmed?  I am outgoing. Open. Engaging. Talkative. Social by nature. I am ME!! I want my little guys to feel GREAT in being THEM!! We went to Hollywood Studios on Sunday and had a blast. We love going with the boys. Our family loves going and doing things. WE also love being home. WE woke up today with the boys both crawling into our bed. I made pancakes from scratch. Then the boys played outside with their new light sabers and we had fun doing crafts. Now Holden is sleeping and Tanner is playing quietly in his room. AHHH peaceful. (At least for the moment) It is windy and cold. I am enjoying a fire and making chili for dinner. Florida winter!

Everyday LIFE

Psalm 143:10 Teach me to do your will, for you are my GOD; may your good spirit lead me on level ground.      What a beautiful morning. It is super duper quiet at my house. The kids are gone to their Meme and Grampy's house. (they left yesterday afternoon) And Billy went to the gym.  It has been nice. This is only the 3rd time Holden has stayed overnight away. We have a babysitter Carly who is awesome and Billy and I are sure to do date nights and outings with friends. It is a rare treat however to lay in bed until 7:30 and wake up just the 2 of us here. The only other 2 weekends we have had no kids was 2013 and 2014 when we went away for the weekend to run marathons. Holden stayed with my mom one year and my sister in law and brother the next. Tanner stayed with my sister. He has stayed the night away several times. He loves going to my sister's and playing with Tristan my nephew and I'm so happy that they have each other and so close in age. He also loves going to Papa's or Meme's and Grampy's and I'm so fortunate to have family so close. I am even more fortunate to have people in our lives that we trust and LOVE.  I like time alone. I'm wired that way. It recharges me. My mantra for 2016 is just LET IT GO. Everything. I like order and planning. Things don't always go as planned. I have a few ladies in my life who really help me put things in perspective. Billy too is so sweet these days. He is very loving and cheerful and I LOVE seeing God work in his life. He is a wonderful husband even when he drives me crazy. :) I can not wait to start using the camera he got me for Christmas. I'm going to try and sign up for a class too. Exciting. Holden and Tanner are growing fast and learning lots. Tanner is reading so well and it really struck me the other night when he read a book all by himself with some longer words that it was just the other day he was crawling in my lap and we were reading books in the rocking chair. There is no crib at my house anymore and our rocking chair is put in storage. The walkers and baby carriers have been replaced with scooters and bikes.  We are onto new adventures and I'm excited. I love each phase. Holden LOVES being outside and recently his favorite thing is is riding his little bike. It was Tanner's bike but we put new tires on it and he's good to go. He cracks me up. We went out to Cohaedjoe park on Tuesday and he loves going there. It is pretty hilly. Rather than learn to brake if he got going too fast he would just jump off. SO FUNNY!! Tanner is doing fantastic at school and I am working with him on his writing. Outside of his normal reading and writing I am encouraging him to write stories every week. He loves it. He wrote one yesterday about his daddy taking him and his brother to see the new Star Wars on New Year's Eve. I love that boy. He has always been my child to play make believe for hours. He loves drama at school. I am so proud of my boys. 6 and 3 are very fun ages. I turn the day to day over to my Savior. I love my kids more than words can say and Jesus loves them even more than that.