Prison and FREEDOM!!

I just left the women's prison earlier and my heart is filled with gratitude, compassion, and sadness. These are women who have made bad choices. They have children that they do not get to kiss goodnight. They have aging parents that will die and they won't get to attend the funeral. They have friends that will go shopping without them. They have sisters that they never get phone calls from telling them about their day. They have kids that started school this week and they were not there to see them off nor were they home when their kids came home. They do not get the luxury to go have coffee or even pick out their own clothes. I have great compassion for these women because I too have been where they are and I am so grateful to be home right now. I just peeked in on my son and I can NOT even imagine not being able to kiss him goodnight, read him his stories and pray with him. I know that my freedom is a gift and it comes at a cost. I serve a mighty KING who has had his hands on me. I am a member of a program that has taught me much about life and what is in important in LIFE. PEOPLE are important. ALL people. I have learned this and am still learning this and asking GOD to show me how to love others the way he loves me. I am wanting to serve others and have GOD use me and my past to glorify him. I heard a woman's story tonight that truly touched me. She talked about her dad teaching her to read when she was little. He was able to see her clean before he passed away. It made me think of my own dad. I called him immediately after leaving the prison and so grateful that he came to see me while I was there. Even more grateful that he never has to visit me there again. Billy and I have been talking about parenting and wanting to raise our son loving God and loving others. He will learn alot about life from watching how we spend OUR TIME!! Billy and I believe this verse. Psalms 127:3 "Children are a heritage from the LORD, offspring a reward from him." Listening to this woman's story I thought about all the things my mom did for me growing up. She would leave notes in my lunches. She would fix my hair for school. She stood in line one year forever so that my sister and I could have the cabbage patch dolls that we wanted. ( I still remember mine) Her name was Phoebe Myra and she hated baths. :) My dad would ride bikes with us. He taught me how to ride a motorcycle. He loved spending time with us kids. I know all of us that are parents think of things we would do differently than our parents and YES I do too. Tonight though I am remembering all the things I would do the same. Like hugs and kisses. WE got lots of those when I was little. Tanner does too. Cherish it. I met some moms tonight that are missing that. I can not share about anyone Else's life just my own. When we were little our parents were there. They loved spending time with us and that's what I will carry with me. By the grace of GOD I am clean tonight, I am NOT in prison, I am a present mother, and I talked to both my parents today. Grateful that they stood by me all those years when all I did was hurt them. Grateful today that I can think of others and have compassion for them. I know that I would not trade my past for anything because today I can help others with it. It breaks my heart when I see someone joke or make light of someone Else's life. That is tragic. I know we as humans ALL fall short, all hurt, and all have needs. People were there for me in my dark hours. I am trying hard to do the same. I know with God I can. I am Blessed!!